The start of a new school year feels like a fresh beginning: new books, new uniforms, and the excitement of seeing old friends again. But for many children, it also brings something less talked about: anxiety. The thought of walking into a new classroom, meeting a new teacher, or even just getting back into the routine after a long holiday can make a child feel nervous or overwhelmed.

As parents, it is easy to brush off these worries with a quick “you will be fine,” but for a child, those feelings are very real. The good news is that back-to-school anxiety is common, and with the right support, children can learn to manage it and feel more confident. The first step is understanding what is going on and giving them the reassurance they need.

Recognizing the Signs of Anxiety

Children rarely come out and say, “I’m anxious about school.” Instead, their worries often show up in other ways. Knowing the signs makes it easier for you to respond with patience and support. Some common signs of back-to-school anxiety include:

  • Complaining of stomach aches, headaches, or feeling “sick,” especially on school mornings.
  • Trouble sleeping, like tossing and turning or waking up in the night.
  • Becoming unusually clingy or not wanting to leave your side.
  • Sudden changes in mood, such as irritability, crying easily, or getting frustrated over small things.
  • Avoiding conversations about school or refusing to get ready in the morning.
  • Loss of appetite, or eating much less than usual.
  • Regression in behavior, like bedwetting or needing comfort items they had outgrown.

When you notice these patterns, it is important to pause and see them for what they are: signs of worry, not misbehavior.

Let us look at how we can help them overcome this anxiety and become excited about school.


1. Open Conversations About Their Feelings

Now that you understand what the real issue is, you need to create a safe space for your child to have those honest conversations. Children often carry their worries quietly because they don’t want to “bother” you, or they think their fears are silly. But when you invite them to talk, you show them it is safe to share.

Instead of asking general questions like, “Are you okay?”, try gentle and specific ones such as:

  • “What part of school are you looking forward to?”
  • “Is there anything that makes you feel nervous about going back?”
  • “What would make your mornings feel easier?”

The key is to listen without jumping in too quickly to “fix” the problem. Sometimes all your child needs is to be heard and reassured. Phrases like “That sounds tough; I understand why you feel that way” or “Lots of children feel nervous before school starts; you are not alone” can calm their fears more than you might think.

When your child feels listened to, they will open up to you more in the future.

2. Establish Routines Early

Uncertainty feeds anxiety. Having a clear daily routine helps children feel secure and in control, especially during transitions like going back to school.

Use this simple, repeatable plan to ease your child into school mode. Adapt the times to your family.

One Weeks Before School

  • Shift sleep gradually: Move bedtime and wake-up 15 minutes earlier every 2–3 days until you are on the school schedule.

  • Practice the morning flow: Do a “mock school morning” twice a week, get dressed, eat, pack a bag, and be “out the door” by a set time.

  • Set up spaces: Create a spot for shoes, a backpack, a water bottle, and a study corner.
  • School warm-up chats: Each evening, ask: “One thing you are excited about?” and “One thing you are unsure about?” Keep answers short and reassuring.

  • Micro-jobs: Give child-sized tasks (fill water bottle, put homework folder in bag) to build independence.

Night-Before Routine (15–25 minutes)

  • Pack the backpack: Homework, text books, notebooks,  pencil case, signed papers, water bottle, and lunch/snack.
  • Clothes ready: Lay out uniform/outfit, socks, shoes, and hair items.

  • Charge devices: Put the school tablet/laptop/phone on the charger in a common area.

  • Pick tomorrow’s “focus”:One small intention: “Ask the teacher where the library is” or “Say hi to one new person.”
  • Wind-down: Bath/shower → light stretch/reading (10–15 min) → lights out at set time.


3. Focus on the Positives of School

When a child is worried about school, their mind often zooms in on everything that feels scary: tests, homework, making friends, or even just finding the right classroom. As a parent, you can gently help shift their attention to the good parts of school life.

  • Talk about favorite subjects or activities. If your child loves art, remind them of painting in class. If they enjoy sports, highlight that PE or football practice is coming up.

  • Bring up friends. Ask, “Who are you excited to see again?” or “What games do you think you will play at break time?” This gets them thinking about the fun side of friendships.

  • Point out milestones. Moving to a new class means they are growing older, learning new things, and taking a step forward in their journey. Celebrate that growth with them.

  • Share your own school stories. Tell them about the parts of school you enjoyed, like a teacher you liked or a friend you made. This would make your child feel better seeing you had ups and downs too but still managed to enjoy school.

The goal isn’t to ignore their worries but to balance them with reminders of what makes school exciting. When children can see both sides, their fears don’t feel quite so big.

Your Child Cares About School

Back-to-school anxiety is more common than we think, and it doesn’t mean your child is weak or unprepared. It simply shows that they care about what lies ahead. As a parent, your support can make all the difference because at the end of the day, what matters most is that your child knows they are not alone.